Orange Glo
Awesome: Mini perfume gift with purchase
Awkward: Not being able to decide if I smell like cream sickle or wood cleaner
Awesome vs. Awkward
I stumbled upon a blog that has awesome awkward Thursday’s. She’s hilarious and I thought I would try to come up with some to keep my days fun…so here goes.
Awkward: Waking up to room mates talking really fast and really loud in different languages.
Awesome: Them closing my bedroom door so I can keep sleeping.
Its the little things :)
Desire.
As I sit in bed and watch the sun and rain pour down together, I cant help but know there is something going on that is so much bigger than I. I read my last post (with a small bit of shame) with that sense of peace. That sense of knowing that no matter where I am or what I am doing there is a reason for it. There is a calm in the storm.
Lately I have had so many different desires flowing back and forth from my heart to my head. Not until today, relaxing and praying, have I realized that someone knows the desires of my heart even before I do. Being closer to Him is one step closer to these desires. Along with that comes the reminder that these selfish desires are not what is going to make me complete. They are not going to fill that void that we all crave. Only time spent in His glory will.
I recently re-read the story of Mary and Martha. Jesus does not care for the things we do to please him as much as he just require us to relish in him and enjoy his presence. How cool :)
So today, i’ll just be quiet and enjoy.
raging
Why does is always seem like when I take one step forward I take two steps back. Theres always this constant battle between my head and my heart and they can never seem to coincide. Why is it that Im always so focused on other peoples feelings that I cant seem to make a decision and decide what I want or whats best for me? I just want to be at peace. Waiting for the day I can wake up without worrying about something.
Woosaw
Today I finally got up on the mountain! It was cold, it was hard, but if all the hard things I’ve gone through have been just to get me there…I’m ok with that. I made a friend (yay!) and her name is Emily Swinkels, yes ya heard me. We went up on the mountain and I got my first taste of it. It was frustrating and I got lost, but I found my own way. Hear that? Found my own way…not something I’ve been able to say for a while. I focused on my riding, my switches and speed and can say in pretty proud! Only 2 bails and a few stumbles. I can’t wait to see my progress by the end of the season! There were a few times I was so focused and then I would fall, look up, and realize…holy smokes I’m engulfed in mountains. They were incredible. The sun poked through and you just feel lighter. It was a good day. Let’s see what tomorrow holds, I’m so ready for it!
Whistler..part 1
Well, looks like I forgot my journal back home..so blogging it is. Im here! In whister, this beautiful, crazy, undiscovered town.
The trip was nuts. They overbooked my flight, and…lesson learned…had packed too much luggage so was very late checking in. I got on a noon flight, so no worries there. I had a knot in my stomach all day, wondering how the heck I ended up on that plane. I was sitting there seriously not remembering how I quit my job, left my home, and was off to an unknown place.
As I sit here now after my past few days, I see all these people around me who have come to this place for some reason or another. All the people have come from all over the world hoping to have some fun and try something new. Why did I do it? To be honest I havent quite figured that out yet.
Ive always wanted a change, an adventure of some kind. Maybe this was my first step. But one thing I know is true…I chose to not be alone. Andrew got his job out here and I was left at home wondering if I stayed…would I end up being permanently alone? Would moving to BC be the only way to keep us together and ultimately for me to not be lonely? I know coming out here was for me…to ride and to meet new people…all craving some sort of adventure. Now the question Im asking myself is…what do I want? What in life am I craving? What kind of people and things do I want to surround myself with? What are my goals? These are questions that Ive never asked myself.
Ive always been one to follow others. I would never call myself a leader by any means. I think the reason is Im afraid to be disliked, unloved, or to fail. I always thought I was confident but when I sit back and look at my life…Ive never been confident to choose what I want, despite what others may think or who may leave me. God is really showing me that he has control. In my wildest decisions and mistakes…he has placed these stepping stones for me and controls them. I need to keep reminding myself this year that I need to surrender to him because he is the ultimate adventure. He is what I should be craving. This life, as beautiful as it is…is just a temporary home before the ultimate one. He chooses whether or not I wake up every day, but I need to choose to follow him every day because that is where I will gain the ultimate joy.
I need to thank him every day, not worry about every day. HE is in control, he needs to work in me.
Lets see how it goes…ill keep you posted.
